What's with China and antique horn speakers? Enjoy the Music claims the M12 and M15 speakers from Opera Consonance are new but I have my doubts. In any case, horns, for those not in the know, offer extremely high sensitivity (94dB+) which means you don't need gobs of power to drive them. The Zu Druid (101 dB), another high sensitivity speaker (though not a horn) rocked an amp with only .75 watts at a recent show. Yeah, you could probably power these suckers off of your iPod. Why does high-sensitivity matter? Good question. Some just say it sounds better, though the majority of "world class" speakers have low to mid sensitivity.

In any case, China seems to have a thing for mating huge horn tweeters and massive bass drivers. Above is the Opera Consonance M15 with a 15" front woofer and what they claim is a 28" "Dome titan. compressive alt driver, rear-radiant." Not sure what that means but I guess it explains the largest port I've ever seen.

Above, the Usher Audio D2 rocks dual 15" bass drivers and a wooden horn with an exotic beryllium tweeter. Sensitivity is 98dB and freq is 28Hz to 20kHz.

And finally, the biggest damn horn of all, the $50k XLH REF-1812 distributed by AAA Audio combines an 18" bass driver with two 6" midranges and a retro megaphone tweeter. I saw these suckers in Vegas and, yeah, they're as massive as you imagine. Some magazine needs to give an award for "largest speakers shoehorned into a CES coffin." I'm told they weigh 1000 pounds and stand 7 feet tall. Lord help the man who buys these without consulting the wife.

As for sound, Positive Feedback has a MUST READ REVIEW of these giants and the companion $25k XLH 600 watt monoblock amplifiers. High sensitivity is for low watts, right? So what's the deal with hugh wattage? Best quote ever:

"The six hundred watts threw those behemoths around like a Pomeranian's chew toy."

XLH = Pomeranian chew toy. If I don't see that on an XLH magazine ad I'll be very disappointed. And then we hear the ultimate truth about this audio industry and single men:

"So, now I can't invite anyone to my house. It would be like having a prospective mate over for dinner and then introducing her to my eight-foot, blonde Burmese python...and wondering why she screams and runs out the door when I try to get her to feed it a live rat. I simply do not understand women."

I love it because it's so true. Sit a woman down in front of your bazooka speakers, ask her to experience the sonic micro-dynamics and she'll think you're foreshadowing your late night, under-the-covers micro-dynamics. Which brings up an interesting point. As rock star comedian David Chapelle says, "why do men buy nice homes? Because women like nice homes. If we could have sex in a cardboard box, we would." So why isn't there a brand of speakers made to attract women? Is it just impossible to make audio attractive? Men, from this moment forward, I'm dedicating my life to a new company: Aphrodisiac Audio. If I'm successful, I expect nothing less than demigod status and a shrine built in my honor.